Todei, a collection of TobiDei
by Dajypop
Summary: As the title says, its a bunch of TobiDei one-shots. Rating is just in case.


Title: What the Hell is that?  
Author: Piratedolliebaby (Lacey)  
Rating: T for Language  
Fandom: Naruto  
Category: Romance/Humor  
Pairing: TobiDei  
Summary: Deidara expands on his thoughts on Tobi, and how in the world their relationship could possibly soar into the next level.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, all. This was a sort of challenge for me from myself to please my friend Lizzie. She's the COOLEST EVAR and I had to write her some good TobiDei, as well as a decent SasoDei so that maybe she can build up more tolerance to her most hated pairing. Anyway, the ratings will fluctuate between one-shots (This is a collection of one-shots, people. Some are linked, some have nothing to do with each other), but the entire story is rated M just in case. Once I get done with them, I just might change the rating, just depends on how it goes, I suppose.

If there ever happened to be one pair of unlikely partners, it was Deidara and Tobi. The stone ninja knew this, and even as he sat on his bed and pondered it, he couldn't possibly come up with an answer to his biggest question; _What in the Hell is happening to us_? As much as he had to admit Tobi was sweet, there really wasn't much there that the two men could agree on. He'd written out a list, something common he did when unsure of what to do, and as far as he was concerned, he didn't know enough to really make a decent decision.

TobiDeidara

FudgeStrawberry  
UnintelligentMore intelligent  
Crap at ArtProfessional Artist  
Wears a stupid maskCurious what's under it  
Speaks in third personUses 'un' or 'hmph'  
SweetLikes explosives  
Boyfriend MaterialIndecisive

That was really all that he had on either of them. With a sigh, the blonde glanced up at his ceiling, lying back on his bed with his hands behind his head. His hair was down, and now he seemed to look a little more feminine than usual laying there in his black mesh-and-solid shirt. Of course, Tobi picked this time in particular to show up with that gleeful look behind his mask, a breath held in at the look on his beloved sempai's face.

"Sempai pretty." Tobi gasped, interrupting Deidara's thoughts and earning himself quite the angry look. He hadn't meant to come out as such a Neanderthal, but the words had left him before he had any time to think. He really couldn't help himself, and he figured that, despite the look of death on his partner's face, the exasperated blonde before him took that thought to heart. With a small smile, as well as a deep blush hidden beneath his mask, Tobi shifted something behind his back a little. "Tobi has something for Sempai." He added finally, the blonde carefully sitting up.

"Whatcha got, Tobi?" He questioned, head tilting a little, long golden locks falling in a careful curtain, separating gracefully on each side of his shoulder. His long bangs hung over one deep blue eye, and the already dumbfounded male standing before him seemed to drop a few more IQ levels. Hiding away his list beneath his pillow, he raised a brow and carefully looked his partner up and down. "Tobi?"

Blinking a little, the older male shook his head and attempted to bust his mind free of thoughts impure. "Right…sempai, Tobi made this for you!" From behind his back, the taller man produced a lop-sided, hot pink sweater with a bright, eye-blinding green bird at the off-center. One sleeve was longer than the other, the collar was huge; all in all, it was just a frightful pink mess. The truth of the matter was that it was just _awful_…but Tobi _had_ made it.

"You…made that…?" Deidara was at a loss. His near-worthless present was sweet, at least, despite being useless and terrible. And _pink._ But Tobi seemed proud of it anyway.

"Yeah! A while back, I asked Kakuzu to teach me to sew…I had to pay him a lot, but it was worth it, right?" It was all the blonde could do not to say anything, but eventually his words slipped out.

"Didn't teach you to cut things out or measure, did he?"

"He said that would take all of sempai's money, too."

"Oh." Well…he was sort of happier with his gift, now, despite it looking to be some kind of deceased pink cat. It did sort of resemble one; and his eyes couldn't help but narrow. "Just toss it somewhere.." He offered finally, gesturing around the somewhat dirty room. He had clothes tossed about, the cloak all the members of the Akatsuki wore nearly torn between its spot on a chair and the floor. Of course, Tobi couldn't stand seeing his present on the floor or somewhere his beloved Deidara wouldn't see it, so he found a couple things that looked like pins and hung it up on the wall beside the other's bed.

"There! Nice and pretty, just like Deidara-sempai." He cooed, sitting on the bed without being invited. Deidara bristled and nearly growled, scooting away from the other and hiding himself away under his pillow, holding his list beneath himself. "Has Deidara-sempai decided yet?"

It was now that his mind wandered back to what had really started all the thoughts bumping and colliding in his mind, creating nothing more than a flurry of confusion that had begun to get on his nerves worse than the man that had started them. With a sigh, he let his mind drift for only a few minutes.

_It had been a nice day at the base, Deidara had been relaxing calmly in his room, brushing his hair in a mirror and looking himself over, trying to tell himself he was still manlier than Itachi at least. With a few bats of his short eyelashes, he confirmed it; his hair was the only girly feature about him. It had been at this moment that Tobi had done something very strange. The boy had been preparing a picture for his sempai when he had suddenly opened up his mouth and something intelligible left his lips. _

"_Sempai…I was wondering something." He started, looking up at his partner with eyes glistening behind his mask. _

"_What's that, Tobi?" He resisted the urge to call him stupid or say something about how he had actually had a _"thunk" _instead of a "think". Raising a brow at his older…friend…he turned to face him and sit kind of slumped, his undershirt clinging to his body nicely and sending shivers down Tobi's spine._

"_I…" It had started with that one-letter word that nearly made Deidara's jaw drop, "Like sempai."_

"_I…like…you too, Tobi." Deidara had replied, gritting his teeth at first. It was then that he glanced at the man and he seemed to have a different air about him._

"_No, I _like_ you. Like Itachi and Kisame like each other." Tobi interjected, sitting up and leaving his crayons on the bed. He had moved before Deidara, sitting on his knees directly in front of him._

_Blinking and looking honestly shocked, the younger boy stared at the orange mask for the longest time. He just sat there, staring and pondering before something totally flaky left his lips, "Let me think about it."_

Since then, it had been a good four weeks at the least, making it exactly a month today. No wonder why Tobi had come back to him to question it. Looking down, he sighed and closed his eyes, before letting his head fall back against the headboard with a _thunk_. It was quiet for quite some time, Tobi's expectant stare boring holes into Deidara's face and chest. He really wasn't sure where Tobi was staring half the time, but he figured it was somewhere on his body; he could feel that much.

It had been nearly two hours before he opened his eyes again and tilted his head to look at Tobi. Blinking a little, he finally sighed and closed his eyes once more. Of course, Tobi was slowly getting bored and had begun sewing up a rip on his shirt, and doing so poorly enough that Deidara took pity on him and eventually took his needle and did it himself. He'd learned a little bit of sewing, and he did so better than his friend.

"I suppose…" He started carefully as he fixed up the sleeve. "…That I can't say no to you." The blonde added, letting his eyes flick up to the hole in Tobi's mask before flittering back down to his work. Once he was done, he was at a loss for what to do with his hands. He could suddenly taste something in his mouth and looked down to see one of his hands licking Tobi's glove. This was stupid.

"Yes." He answered finally, getting up, "Now, get out." He pointed at the door. Tobi had slowly began to become ecstatic, and now he jumped up, out of his seat on the bed, and nearly tackled his new lover. "Oh, thank you, Sempai! Tobi loves you!" And, in one quick gesture of just how much he loved him, he pulled his mask up to his nose and gave Deidara a gentle, swift peck on the lips. Once he was done, he got up from his position straddling the other man on the floor and nearly raced for the door, certain that his lover was going to kill him.

AN: Okay, so, while writing this story, I have realized that I probably won't go in order. Well…I should say these stories. If you really want a timeline, then I shall post one on this chapter when I'm totally done. I still don't know how many parts there will be to this, or how many I feel up to writing. As of now, I have two more running rampant in my head that I want to try out, and I'm definitely going to try for five. I just hope everything works out in the end and I get my computer soon so I can finish working on them and actually upload them more than just like…once a week. Anyway, until next time, dear readers, keep in mind that reviews are like McDonald's to a fat kid; one of the greatest things in the world.


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